Hi there! That’s a good question. And I hate to say “it depends” but… it sort of depends on the fetish. Since you didn’t specify, I’d recommend two of the more high traffic sites to start with. Fetlife covers a little bit of everything. It may take you a little while to get used to the organization, because it’s kind of all over the place. But whatever you’re into, it’s there someplace!

The other recommendation comes with a warning. Collarspace is a legit website. At one point it used to be really cool. But that was about… oh, 20 years ago. Seriously. Ok, maybe 15. I’ve been doing this a long time. The point is, they haven’t updated their site in all this time. And there are a TON of fake profiles on CS. So… so many. The good news is that there are also lots of real ones there. You just have to be very patient and have lots of common sense. Also, because they’re outdated, getting a new profile approved takes forever. And if you find a typo and want to fix it? Your entire profile will be shut down for review for about another month. It’s frustrating as anything to be there. The reason why so many people keep going back is because of the high traffic, and that’s why I recommend it, even with all the problems it presents.

If you don’t find who you’re looking for on those two sites, you’ll probably come across someone there who can point you in the right direction. Good luck!